But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
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