That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
Randomize
