The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
never play flip cup with pint glasses
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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