I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
Randomize
