what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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