is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Randomize
