my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
