I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize
