the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Randomize
