Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
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