Texts From Last Night

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  (440): View more from Ohio

  We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.

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  (440): We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night. http://tfl.nu/4khi
  Replies (34) Good night (4551) Bad night (739)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"

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  (513): well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment" http://tfl.nu/5a1z
  Replies (6) Good night (1094) Bad night (3630)
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  (650): View more from California

  I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.

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  (650): I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world. http://tfl.nu/egr4
  Replies (31) Good night (6194) Bad night (2060)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.

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  (503): After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him. http://tfl.nu/iy8v
  Replies (20) Good night (4991) Bad night (900)
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  (281): View more from Texas

  His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled

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  (281): His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled http://tfl.nu/gplx
  Replies (20) Good night (1017) Bad night (4318)
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  (501): View more from Arkansas

  What happened to him?

  (1-501): View more from Arkansas

  He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum

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  (501): What happened to him? (1-501): He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum http://tfl.nu/owcl
  Replies (4) Good night (4001) Bad night (665)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.

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  (314): On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner. http://tfl.nu/glyx
  Replies (4) Good night (2103) Bad night (643)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.

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  (304): It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly. http://tfl.nu/eai2
  Replies (7) Good night (1066) Bad night (2414)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status

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  (908): As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status http://tfl.nu/7e09
  Replies (6) Good night (1704) Bad night (681)
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore

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  (401): um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore http://tfl.nu/seg6
  Replies (11) Good night (792) Bad night (2346)
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  Her only article of clothing is an American Flag

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  (613): Her only article of clothing is an American Flag http://tfl.nu/tlj8
  Replies (6) Good night (1901) Bad night (423)
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  (219): View more from Indiana

  Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon

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  (219): Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon http://tfl.nu/lp84
  Replies (7) Good night (1178) Bad night (390)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  These people don't understand my stages of drunk

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  (850): These people don't understand my stages of drunk http://tfl.nu/g6eb
  Replies (2) Good night (449) Bad night (243)
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  (865): View more from Tennessee

  I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds

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  (865): I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds http://tfl.nu/ryhj
  Replies (2) Good night (546) Bad night (272)
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  (810): View more from Michigan

  Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.

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  (810): Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great. http://tfl.nu/ppa3
  Replies (9) Good night (681) Bad night (463)

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