Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
