I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Randomize
