i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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