I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
I wish i was in the wii world.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
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I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
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