Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
porn star boner night. come get it.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Randomize
