Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
