im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
Randomize
