so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Randomize
