Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
Randomize
