do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Randomize