Can i not drive my cunt home
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
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