in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Randomize