This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
Randomize