please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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