In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I don't want my vagina anymore.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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