i think my tv is drunk
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
