You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
I don't think brook has ever known best
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Randomize
