Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
Randomize