I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Randomize
