Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
Small penises have feelings too.
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Randomize
