I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
