I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Are we still banned from the library?
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Randomize
