why didn't you poke me back
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
