Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
babies were throwing up all over the place
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Randomize
