This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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