I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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