Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Randomize
