It's just like the Real World with babies
Sober January is a disaster.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
