All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
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