She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Randomize
