I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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