All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
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