butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
