4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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