Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
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