hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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