Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
