I just woke up to a lawnchair covered in lipstick. I'm wearing red lipstick. What happened and is the tequila?
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
I have post one night stand depression
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