Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
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