You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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